i had a really brief draft written out that day, one that had an exurb of something that would be able to spur me to write out what i want to say.
what i want you to know. what i wish to tell you. what i wish i could tell you. what i hope that you'd be able to understand and silently agree with me. what i would think you could relate to and like me, give some sort of support to.
but i guess it really shouldnt be necessary.
it's not that urgent anyway. it'll come in due time. though i really have to say that i wish it were the same.
God knows that whatever i were to put down, would probably be felt by that some other. exactly the same, similar, almost likely or just a scratch of a difference. it really doesn't matter.
but it's my way of reaching out to reveal what is inside that could be eating me, consuming me and slowly blinding me. and not to hide.
i don't really care what
those people say,
those people think,
those people who can articulate these situations, events and whatever better. i don't care about
those people.
i don't really care if popular culture really seem to be relate to how everyone feels. or seem to make everyone believe that they themselves are able to feel the same way, that they understand how you feel.
they don't even know you, they don't even care. these people just write based on their own experiences, get paid and fame. do they even
care if you feel the same way? of course not. but really, i don't freakin' care about these people.
sure many times, it just hurts to say or it's just hard to explain, to bring out what you really want to say - even which might not even be able to describe the raw, hard form in words.
but really, most people (okay fine, maybe it's just me) credit effort. even if it comes out like crap.
maybe i'm wrong, well, pardon me but i probably am. especially in such a mood that really has a huge storm inside my head that i have to tame or wait out for it to get blown away the wind.
but i only care about the truest form of expression: personal
original communication.
call it unreasonable expectations if you want, but very much more from those people who mean a whole great darn of deal to me.
i said, that you will always be someone. would you even doubt that too? then why would i be so bothered to have written this out, much more to wonder in exasperation.Labels: nostalgia, wounded
